Sunday, October 30, 2005

Someone gave me the bird

So I think I’m coming down with something...

I haven’t been to the doctor or anything, but on the basis of what I’ve seen on TV and read on the Internet, I’m pretty sure it’s bird flu.

I used to think that self-diagnosis was for fools and New Idea readers. But it seems like everyone is doing it, so it must be ok. Well, everyone at my office (the Temple of DoomTM) anyway:

Most hated of colleagues: “Well, the doctor couldn’t find anything wrong with me, but I looked on the Internet and I’m pretty sure I have got [whatever illness was on All Saints last night]”

Oh, really? Yeah, because those doctors - they know nothing...


Most hated of colleagues: “I’ve pretty much had all the tests they can run and unfortunately they couldn’t find anything wrong with me”


But yeah, basically I’m feeling a little fluey and I’m feeling a sense of over-reaction and panic coming on, so in the spirit of self-diagnosis, why don't I just assume that it must be bird flu.

As I said, I haven’t been to the doctor, but I’m pretty sure its been brought on by some highly contagious scaremongering. I should be right though, I’ve still got the ‘survival’ kit I put together for Y2K, the SARS virus and the inevitable terrorist-attacks-that-haven’t-happened-yet-but-sure-are-going-to-especially-if-we-don’t-get-those-new-laws-through...

Emily Roxs!


I totally heart Emily!

Stuff youse all, especially Daniel Spillane! Foreigner??? Double-u tee eff?

If there was some kind of phrase book, with illustrations, and you looked up "waste of skin", you would so totally find a picture of Daniel Spillane (but someone would probably have defaced it or somethin', with little horns coming out of his head, and a hitler-moustache and cross-eyes - oh wait, he already has those...)

Yeah, so anyway. Everyone else sux0rs compared to Emily.


Saturday, October 29, 2005

22623772 spells...

The intuitive text setting on my mobile phone is one of the wonders of the modern world.

It saves me a lot of time, notwithstanding that it often takes longer to text someone than just call them. Especially when you're like me and insist on sentences, punctuation and coherency.

But is also really intuitive.

When I press the keys that would spell "Canberra", just before I get to the last letter, the result is "Cancers". Or, if I continue and complete the key-pressing, it says "Cancersa".

Which is like, totally my phone saying to me "Canberra is like cancers, eh?"

How does it know how I feel about Stinktown (TM - patent pending)?

Now that's intuition.

Thursday, October 27, 2005