Here are a few things I know will happen:
I will get sick (I always get sick when going on holiday or after a busy time at work). Actually I can feel a bit of a sore throat coming on now…. Cough. I think I need a placebo.
We will get on the wrong tram and end up in some really bad suburb where people get knifed just walking down the street (which I guess is better than Sydney, where one gets shot in one's home these days).
We will find out that Melbourne’s advertising campaign is really just a load of bollocks and the fact that Melbourne has a lot of cafes doesn’t actually mean it is ‘European’. They serve ‘fancy coffee’ in bloody roadhouses on the Pacific Highway these days, you know.
It will rain a lot.
The Swans will lose.
As I am from Sydney, next week you should all look forward to a post from me detailing how shit everything in Melbourne is (“what do you mean, there’s no harbour?!?!” or “Sure, an efficient public transport system is nice, but where’s the gridlock?!?!?! There’s no charm without gridlock!” ).