Wednesday, February 04, 2009

A guy walks into a cafe...

"We'll have two herbal teas, bacon and eggs with toast, and scrambled eggs with a side of smoked salmon and mushrooms.

Oh, and we have to be at an appointment in 10 minutes, so
you'd better get onto that straight away."

Sometimes I wonder what it would be like to go around expecting that the world will bend to your will and expectations, no matter how unreasonable.

It's like those people on the roads who decide that they want to turn left, even if they are in the right-hand lane of a 3-lane highway. Instead of conceding that they've missed the turn and finding somewhere safe to turn around, they just stop dead in the right-hand lane with their left-hand indicator on, waiting for a gap in the traffic, with not a care in the world for the line of 50 cars banked up behind them.

Or the women who force those double-wide prams down narrow, inner-city streets (taking out many a passer-by's ankles on the way) and then act surprised when they don't fit into the teeny-tiny cafes, already crammed full of people and chairs.

It's a scaled-down version of the blokes who driver Hummers around the laneways of Newtown - Newsflash! The built environment will not magically morph itself to adapt to your choices!

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Hmmm, maybe next time I go to the cafe I should ask for a decaf...

3 comments:

Mindy said...

I hope they didn't get their food on time. A'holes. Because I'm feeling nasty I also hope that when they got to their appointment, they had to wait.

Anonymous said...

A guy walked into a bar. And he said "ouch".

Mikhela said...

I get stroppy with people who won't get off the footpath for my double-wide pram. Those child-free people think the world revolves around them, with their unstained, uncrumpled clothes and their un-sucked on iphones and their uninterrupted evenings drinking wine in funky wine bars. F*cken get out of my way or I'll ram you!