Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Because plastic tiaras are always classy

So pretty much as I expected, I am loving the new series of Australian Princess.

My favourite contestant so far has to be Kylie Booby *snigger*. AS IF you wouldn’t have changed your name.

Upon hearing that “Fergie’s sister” would be making a guest appearance, Kylie Booby thought that Jane Ferguson was related to this woman:


rather than this one:


whom she’d never heard of.

In terms of actually liking any of the contestants, I am already a bit fond of Kate the pig farmer although I wager I’ll be crushed by the weight of ‘salt of the earth’ references by about week 3. Kate the pig farmer likes huntin’, shootin’, campin’ and fishin’. So pretty much any activity where you can drop the ‘g’. When described as naïve by Jackie O, Kate had to ask what “naïve” meant.



What qualifies Kate to be the next Australian Princess? “I have the right plumbing”.

Onyaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaa.

One of the highlights of this show for me is the rather base thrill of feeling smarter than them all (lame, I know, but they are probably all thinner than me, so there you go).

So for example, I felt all book-smarts and worldly when, during the ‘learning about other cultures’ section, Carolyn said she had never heard of Tonga before (hasn’t she ever seen the Late Show’s 'It’s Academic' rip-off where every answer is ‘Tonga’?). And when Kylie Booby spoke Arabic to the Tongans. Leanne thought the Tongan guy was ho-o-o-ottttt, which meant she at least remembered who was who.

Did I mention there is a contestant called Kylie Booby? Wow, she is a right cow. What a piece of work.

Unfortunately I think she might get booted early. I recommend tuning in for as much Kylie Booby you can get while she’s still there.

Amanda, the incongruently intelligent doctor is my early pick. Although her ability to string two sentences together may alienate her from the other girls. Her greatest fear is “driving up a really steep hill”. Deep, man.


I’d also like to note Stephanie. After a hard day flogging used corollas at the car yard, Stephanie goes home to run her own spray-tan business. What an entrepreneuse!



When asked what Stephanie wanted to get out of the series, her answer was “my eyebrows back”.

Don’t forget to check out the Australian Princess website, where Jean will teach you how to sit and walk. Finally! I’m so sick of just standing, stuck in the same spot. I wish my parents had taught me how to sit and walk all those years ago.

I've so far resisted the temptation to click through to the forums. My self control can't last long though.

5 comments:

Anonymous said...

fark.

I had this whole pithy comment all typed out and then because blogger is ridiculous with the signing-in now that I've switched to beta or whatever, I lost it (the comment, not my temper).

Anyway. It was high-larious and canvassed such crucial issues as Kate's lack of a chin, my agreemtn that Kylie Booby's name is tres amusant, and posited that the one wot got booted last night resembled actual Australian [former] Princess Jacqueline Gillespie.

Anonymous said...

"agreemtn" /shakes head/

Anonymous said...

I can't believe I missed it! I have to say that on seeing Kylie Booby's captioned picture in the paper on the weekend, I started laughing and couldn't stop. (It was like I was 15.) It's not the name. It's not the fact she's on Australian Princess. It's not that she looks like her name might be Kylie Booby. It's all three.

Mindy said...

I watched it for the first time last night and I'm hooked. I love Kate the pig farmer too. Kylie leaves me speechless, I'm surprised she remembers to breathe sometimes.

tonch said...

omg i had no idea that they were even doing an Australian Princess 2. Maybe their intention was simply to have something where we can all watch it and feel smart.

I love all le français you're using. Ca te fais très chic!