Wednesday, May 03, 2006

The Big Brother facial challenge

1 Open your mouth slightly
2 Protrude your jaw forward
3 Now shift that protruded jaw ever so slightly to the right
4 Tip your head to the left
5 Squint a bit
6 Shake your head a bit
7 Slowly exhale in a slightly audible fashion

Congratulations! You have now mastered Tilli’s “oh my god I hate Camilla she stole and now is wearing my dress the bitch I’m going to kill her” face, which featured in last night’s ‘re-entry of the evicted housemates’ Big Brother super-revenge spectacular episode!

Poor Tilli. I can imagine feeling a bit peeved if Camilla had squeezed her ever so slightly skanky-looking body into some of my clothes. Especially if she had stolened those clothes.

I guess it could have been worse. Tilli could have had to come to grips with one of the many ‘promotional models’ (wink wink) in the house this season wearing her clothes. Shudder.

I think it would have been more exciting if Camilla and oats-bitch Anna were allowed to steal something a bit more imaginative. Say, someone’s medication. Or a kidney.

But I guess they have to make the show it suitable for a ‘G’ timeslot. And I guess medical procedures are probably only allowed in the ‘MA’ timeslot.


PS I hope you are all taking the Big Brother facial challenge at work, at your desks, in open-plan work areas!


Galaxy said...

Heh. I quite like your suggestions for what the revengers could have stolen. Remember last year when they had a competition for 'twist' suggestions, maybe if they do that this year, you'll win. Nothing is out of bounds, obviously.

As for facial expressions, I quited liked the show of disappointment on Camilla and Anna's faces when they were greeted so profusely, with such joy, at first. It suddenly became clear that revenge is not so sweet when you have to face those you've stuck it to. I can't wait to see more details of Camilla promising Tilli that as soon as her luggage arrived she would change out of the dress. Perhaps Tilli will have a ritual burning of it, to ward of evil spirits. In the diary room perhaps, just to get up BB's nose.

Anonymous said...

i love u anna it is lisa evans who won to met u how are you do you have a family if u can i met them Love lisa

Anonymous said...

Hi Camilla
i hate u